finally succumbed (to that social network I avoided for so long)

Well I finally did it. I activated an account on the site that rhymes with Spacehook. I know, I know.

I resisted for years, even belittled it. It seemed like such a silly superficial way to interact with people who are supposed to be your “friends.” I couldn’t see why anyone would spend time following others who they didn’t care to keep up with in real life. (It was different from blogging in that sense, as it’s not like you’re meeting new people  but rather connecting with those you know from “real life.”) But there’s a reason I don’t keep in touch with certain people and I didn’t necessarily want to start now. I’m a big fan of leaving the past behind. Then there’s the whole weird etiquette thing of ignoring requests and other social norms of which I am unaware.

I loved a tweet I once read that said something like, Face.book is for people you know but don’t want to see, and Twitter is for people you don’t know but want to meet.

Still, I thought about signing up just as a way to stay connected with the people I would like to see but don’t get the chance, for whatever reason (i.e., friends and family near and far, or more casual interaction with my colleagues). But with all the issues and such little free time and limited energy, it seemed like a huge vortex of timesuck. But hey, so is blogging, and Twitter, if you allow it.

I didn’t sign up to see how many “friends” I could make, though I know people who seem to collect them, like tweeters who routinely count their followers or bloggers obsessed with stats. But when you have that many “friends,” I just can’t see how you could really follow them all. As with my overloaded blog reader or twitter feed, I simply wouldn’t be able to keep up. In addition to this often neglected blog, I have a family blog (which has fallen behind) and five active email accounts including work. I have plenty to maintain already, and I tend to be easily distracted. (ooh, did you see that cool shiny thing over there?…uh, did someone say chocolate?)

But then Kaye — Baby Jaye’s birthmom who has been traveling since we last saw her in early December — opened an account and started using it to connect with friends and family from the road. We try to keep in touch by phone, but sometimes it’s hard to connect. Kaye is not big on texting as she has an old phone. She has no current address, so I can’t write letters and send pictures. We’ve offered to skype and she expressed some interest but we’ve never done it. We’ve relied on email in the past — that’s how we started our relationship before ever speaking on the phone or meeting in person — but she is not much of a computer person. Which is why I was surprised when she herself succumbed and opened an account and started using it.

So I figured if Kaye could do it, so could I. So I did, using my real name and everything. But now I have this sort of disconnect, where my online lives aren’t integrated and it’s a little odd. Using a pseudonym to blog, I’m used to that in my other life, but it’s strange to have that online. Sure a few of you know me, but the rest of you know me only as Luna (hell, even some of you who know me still call me Luna, and I’m cool with that because Luna saved me and I love her and she = me).

Still, it’s been wonderful connecting with K in such a regular and casual way again. Plus her mom and brother are both on and we “talk” to each other there too. It doesn’t replace seeing each others faces, or giving a hug, or hearing each others voices — especially Baby Jaye’s now that she can talk more — but it’s working for now and it’s easy. Who knew?

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~ by luna on January 28, 2011.

8 Responses to “finally succumbed (to that social network I avoided for so long)”

  1. Welcome to the dark side. 😉 I resisted FB for a long time for all the reasons you’ve mentioned above — worries about the various parts of my life (online & off) colliding, about general privacy issues, about wasting even more time online.

    I finally joined about a year ago & I have to admit, I am mostly enjoying it. I like being able to have more contact with some of my cousins & old friends from high school, now far away. Many of these people I only see briefly every five years or so, maybe longer. I’m also staying better touch with friends I’ve made through my real-life pg loss support group, and a small group of friends I’ve “met” through various online forums. So far, I’ve only turned down two requests (one was a “wtf?? is she kidding??” & the other was from someone I have never met in my life before).(I’ve done some of the quizzes, but I won’t play Farmville or any of the other games.)

    Our nephew actually “friended” me & I was hugely tickled. I try not to post on his wall too much to embarrass him in front of his friends, & frankly I could care less about most of his posts (which dwell on the latest videogames), but I love having that contact with him.

  2. Well, I, for one, was happy to see you over there. I think it can be a fun space if you don’t take it too seriously. I like to jump on for a few minutes here and there and I just grab what information I see. I miss a lot. But I sort of view it like a river, where you dip in and get something, though you’re obviously not taking in the whole river.

    But I admit — I love seeing photos more than hearing words. And I love seeing photos of people I haven’t seen in years to know how they aged.

  3. OMG. When I saw your post title in my Reader I was so worried.

    Whew! It’s only Spacehook!

    As Loribeth said, welcome to the dark side. Bwahahahaha!

  4. When I first joined it, hours would fly by and now I keep it presumably to keep in touch with the industry. I don’t even post pics on it anymore. I also didn’t want every acquaintance I have knowing the daily goings on in my life… so I post infrequently and stalk my friends. Hah!It’s a little like peeping into people’s windows.

  5. I don’t like that site myself, and yet I have an account—because relatives I’m not close to want to see pictures of the baby. And it’s nice to see other people’s kids. But that’s the whole of my experience: no F*rmville.

  6. hehe…i joined a year ago after intentional resistance. but i have to say it has helped me to remain in touch w/ a few key people i don’t run into as regularly.

  7. I avoided it for a long time but now find I enjoy it. I hope you do too.

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