open adoption roundtable: small moments

As part of Open Adoption Roundtable #4, Heather at Production Not Reproduction asks open adoption bloggers to describe “a small moment that open adoption made possible.”

We have only been in an open adoption for less than eight weeks, yet we’ve already had so many beautiful moments made possible only by the openness in our adoption. Yet I can not resist writing about the most beautiful moment of all, though it is not “small” by any measure.

The full story is long overdue, but the most beautiful single moment is the moment I saw our daughter being born. Only in a truly open adoption could I have had the privilege to be present and participate in her birth experience as I did.

Baby J was born at home, in her birth mom’s home, surrounded by skilled midwives and loved ones. The moment I saw her head slowly emerge, I held my breath in awe. I simply could not believe what we were witnessing. As her tiny body came out, I caught her. (Not many women can say they caught their own child!)

The midwives quickly wrapped warm blankets around the baby as I held her for just a moment before passing her to K. We still didn’t yet know whether she was a girl or a boy, and it was my job to call out her gender. But she was covered by the blanket! One of the midwives opened it up so I could see.

“Oh [K], she’s a beautiful girl!” I cried, in tears — and to my husband M, “a beautiful girl…”

After we hugged, sobbing tears of awe and joy, I looked up and realized there was not a dry eye in the room.

And a new family was born.

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~ by luna on July 23, 2009.

27 Responses to “open adoption roundtable: small moments”

  1. What an amazing moment! Beautifully told, as always.

  2. What a beautiful amazing moment.

  3. Hooray! I am so delighted you’ve gotten to have such wonderful moments of unadulterated joy.

  4. No dry eyes here either…. how incredible to have witnessed that!

  5. And not a dry eye among the internets who read this. Beautiful moment, luna. How amazing!

  6. There’s not a dry eye in this room, either. Just perfect.

  7. Beautiful story. Being in the room for my son’s birth was amazing too.

  8. No dry eyes here either!! A beautiful moment never ever forgotten.

  9. Glad I’m alone in the office today so I can sob out all the emotion I’m feeling hearing this. So, so powerful, Luna – it sounds to me like it was a healing and transformative experience, and I’m so tremendously glad you got to go through that.

  10. I can’t imagine how you must have been feeling – surreal perhaps? So raw, so real, so amazing! Catching your child! Wow! I have a question to ask – did you take childcare courses during the waiting time – like how to hold an infant, change diapers, that sort of thing?

  11. Simply awesome.

  12. FABULOUSNESS! Love it! 🙂

  13. Thank you for writing this.

  14. Awestruck and tearful here.

  15. Crying here! That was beautiful Luna. You caught her…I’m in awe. That is so amazing and beautiful.

  16. Chills. Goosebumps. Wow.

  17. Add mine to the wet eyes…there is nothing like it is there?

  18. Yeah, not so much with the small, but certainly beautiful. 🙂
    I love that J has this story if at all possible more than I love that you have it. To know how much love and intent there was in her very birth… I hope that means a lot to her as she grows up.

  19. I love that last line. That sums it up for me.

  20. Oh, Luna, more happily weepy eyes for you and your wonderful family. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful moment. Your words draw a picture I don’t think I’ll ever forget.

  21. That is gorgeous! I can’t believe how much I’ve missed! First of all, a HUGE congrats on your baby daughter! It’s amazing. Not one day goes by that I don’t wish Lily’s birthmom would get in touch with us. When you share the birth of a child with someone – it’s a bond that nobody else can understand and one that defies all rules of a what a family “should” be. She will always be in our hearts and always be a part of our family. I can’t wait to read more about all of us – I’ll just put the Kleenex box next to me on the desk:)

  22. Oh, beautiful!

  23. Gorgeous. You, your family, this story. All of it!

  24. Oh, this is just beautiful to hear. It really helps me a lot as I have been having anxiety about how I will feel at that exact moment. A new family indeed.

  25. […] at life from here writes about the power of being present at her adopted daughter’s […]

  26. […] or worry. Our case worker was excited to hear Baby J’s story, and I teared up thinking about her beautiful birth and telling how we said our goodbyes in K’s […]

  27. […] already shared a small part of Baby J’s beautiful arrival here. I’ve written it in more detail for her to read some day. Next to our wedding day, welcoming […]

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